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A key process in interpersonal interaction is that of social comparison, in that we evaluate ourselves in terms of how we compare to others. In particular, we engage in two types of comparison. First, we decide whether we are superior or inferior to others on certain dimensions, such as attractiveness, intelce, popularity, etc. Here, the important aspect is to compare with an appropriate reference group. For example,modest joggers should not compare their performance with Olympic standard marathon(马拉松)runners. Second, we judge the extent to which we are the same as or different from others. At certain stages of life, especially adolescence, the pressure to be seen as similar to peers is immense. Thus, wearing the right brand of clothes or shoes may be of the utmost importance. We also need to know whether our thoughts, beliefs and ideas are in line with those of other people. This is part of the process of self-validation whereby we employ self-disclosures to seek support for our self-concept. People who do not have access to a good listener may not only be denied the opportunity to heighten their self- awareness, but they are also denied valuable feedback as to the validity and acceptability of their inner thoughts and feelings. By discussing these with others, we receive feedback as to whether these are experiences which others have as well, or whether they are less common. Furthermore, by gauging the reactions to our self-disclosures we learn what types are acceptable or unacceptable with particular people and in specific situations. On occasions it is the fear that certain disclosures may be unacceptable to family or friends that motivates an individual to seek professional help. Counsellors will be familiar with statements such as: "1 just couldn’t talk about this to my husband.", "I really can’t let my mother know my true feelings." Another aspect of social comparison in the counseling context relates to a technique known as normalizing. This is the process whereby helpers provide reassurance to s that what they are experiencing is not abnormal or atypical(非典型的),but is a normal reaction shared by others when facing such circumstances. Patient disclosure, facilitated by the therapist, seems also to facilitate the process of normalizing. It is often difficult for people to heighten their self-awareness without()
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